Ski Racing and Authentic Praise in Education

Inside the Ski Racing Mind: Don't Praise Your Children! | Ski Racing

 This is a great article on how we praise children in sports, and particularly, how we often say "good job" or "great work" and praise outcomes rather than processes.  There is a reference to Carol Dweck's research! Basically, the article talks about not praising inborn talent (you are a gifted skier), but rather praise the areas the child has control over, such as effort, attitude, responsibility, commitment, discipline, focus, emotional mastery, fitness, technique, equipment preparation.   

How does this apply to working with gifted students, and all students?  We need to provide opportunities for the inborn talent to emerge, AND provide encouragement and support for the areas the student has control over....their effort, responsibility, their focus, their preparation, and discipline.  Both work together.  (I believe the innate talent is revealed by the emotional maturity and mastery of the student, but this is a entirely different blog post!). 

Our family has fallen into the ski racing world.  Through this world, my sons have learned a great deal about hard work, disappointment, being organized, the importance of a good attitude, and how to work as a team in a very tough sport.  I am so grateful for the lessons they are learning!  The biggest lesson is disappointment.  My older son races really well, but he is not the fastest kid.  He doesn't win medals.  However, he goes to the award ceremonies after the races, and waits patiently, thinking that perhaps, this time, he will get a medal.  Afterwards, he is crestfallen.  He works so hard and there isn't an external reward for him!

So, we use this as a lesson:  we debrief, we talk about disappointment, and hard work, and we try to focus him on the good things, like being in the moment and knowing that you did your best.  It is so hard and tough, but we are building resiliency, one step at a time.  

Let's focus on building resiliency in our students and teaching them that innate abilities are important (and interesting), but that IT IS our intentions, and our effort, and our hard work, and our commitment, and our passion for what we are doing that matter much much more. Disappointment is good.  It refocuses our soul and helps us learn.